I Gave My Boyfriend My Virginity, Yet He's Doing This To Me

My boyfriend who I'm in love with complains and sometimes gets upset that my v*gina happens to be looser at sometimes than other times. He thinks I'm cheating, but I'm not. In fact, I lost my virginity to him when I was just 19 and we are planning to get married when I graduate from the University.

Now, I'm 22 and we are still an item and this problem is surfacing. What's going on?

- this is a message from Ibukun who is based in Ibadan to Aunty Julie. Below is her response:

Dear Ibukun,
A woman's v*gina is less elastic when it is not s*xually aroused. It becomes more elastic or "looser" when the woman is s*xually excited. The more excited, the looser. A woman may feel "tighter" to a man when she is less aroused, less comfortable, and having less pleasure than her partner.

Also, hormonal shifts during a woman's menstrual cycle affect v*ginal secretions and may affect the v*ginal elasticity. She may feel "looser" on certain days of her cycle than on others.

Certain drugs, such as antihistamines, may make the walls of the vagina feel dry so they seem "tighter."

Some men tend to be anxious about their s*xual performance. It's always best to discuss such problems with your partner or with a professional.